Thanksgiving preparations are heavily under way here at the Kooky household. BS's parents will be joining us for Thanksgiving dinner here at our house. I LOVE Thanksgiving. It's a holiday I've always adored. Growing up a chronically hungry child (due to a super fast metabolism not lack of nutrition) in a large relatively poor family Thanksgiving was the highlight of my year. We would go to one Grandma's house for Thanksgiving lunch, I would stuff myself silly then go run around with the cousins. Fifteen minutes later I would be back to eat pie and have 2 or 3 different kinds, basically stuffing myself again. Then I would run around with the cousins again to work off more food, and we would go to my other Grandmother's house for Dinner and do it all over again. Mmmmmm fooooood.
So now, even though it's only my little family and BS's Parents, I go all out for Thanksgiving. I want to provide for myself and my children that same happy full-belly feeling that I had growing up. So, we make pies ahead of time (and try to have at least two different desert options, always including Pumpkin Pie) and we make Turkey, and Stuffing, and Salad, and Potatoes, and ... well you get the picture. Anyway, being a fairly "green " person I prefer making my Pumpkin Pie from scratch, with a fresh pumpkin cooked at home and pureed not some stuff from a can. So yesterday we pulled out the Pie Pumpkins purchased ahead of time and started trying to hack them in half.
I don't know what the deal was but I must have bought the woodiest pie pumpkins ever! Those things were bad and we don't have a good strong serrated blade here, we have some thin steak knives, and we have some quality steak knives that are only half serrated (at the tip). So we had to get creative and tough with the pumpkins. So, the first one BS and I are taking turns hacking at it and passing the baby back and forth. Finally I get freaking sick of it and we're 3/4 of the way through the pumpkin down both sides, I just opened up the top (cut out the stem) and pulled the damn pumpkin apart using sheer brute strength. The 2nd pumpkin was even worse, I literally had to saw through the shell and then cut through the flesh separately. So I spent all the time to get 3/4 of the way through that one and I was beat. BS stepped in and demanded I let her try, so I eventually did, and she ripped apart the thicker woodier pumpkin the same way.
So during this whole ordeal BS and I were arguing mostly jokingly back and forth. Her "let me do that", me "you don't have to be the man about things, you no longer have more muscle strength than I do", her "but I'm bigger", me "and" etc etc etc.
See here's the thing, at a glance this would seem to be a direct result of the transition, but the more I thought about it, it's not. Sure the stuff we were saying was a direct result of the transition, but here's a glimpse of what this same thing would have been like pre-transition. 'Him' "let me do that", me "I'm fine", 'him' "seriously let me do that", me "I got it! I'm not a wimp", 'him' "but I'm stronger", me grumblingly backing off when I get worn out.
So, when you really look at these exchanges, there's not necessarily a role change in our house. In many ways there seems to be just a new point of view and a new understanding of the dynamic between two headstrong, stubborn women, one of whom just happened to be born in a male body.
-Kooky Mommy
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